Sustenance

The past couple of weeks have been exhausting. (Okay, let's be realistic, the past several months have been exhausting.) In the crazed commotion of the past couple of weeks, my main goal in life has been to survive. Heard of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs? I'm on the bottom level right now. Aaaaand there's the baby waking up from his morning nap...

...and I'm back! Baby is sleeping, I'm eating lunch. Stuff it, Maslow, I'm rocking the basic needs today! Don't worry, I'm not going to venture too far up the pyramid.

With my goal being survival, I haven't really invested much energy into anything else. I've been sleeping as much as possible, scraping by with the bare minimum of having some sort of food to eat and showering most days. And that's about it. Despite the ridiculous amount of help I've been getting, mostly from my amazing hubby, I'm still drained. We're talking brain rattling, zombie drained.

My sweet boy has been teething, and the only thing he wants is to nurse. He's started pursing his lips when you try to give him anything else. Binky? No way, you can't trick me! Teether? No thank you, mama! Teething gel? HA, that's for babies! It's cute, and then it's just not.

What I've realized through his little lip pursing escapade is that he knows what he wants and he knows where to get it. We've often chuckled over the past few months as he wiggles down to chest level because he wants to eat. It's usually cute.

He knows from where his sustenance comes, and he will do just about anything to get there.

Well, I know from where my sustenance comes, but I don't always put up a fight to get there. The verdict is out: I will often encounter draining situations, and many times, I will need help. Oh, how I need help. But I also need to remember that my Sustenance is not far away, and even if I don't get sleep, there is still energy and strength available to meet my lack. It's just one "Lord, help me" away. It's worth fighting for.

He's waking again. That was a short nap. Lord, help me.